How to Be a Better Home Cook (without crying)
plus a Nancy Meyers inspired cooking playlist
šŗ And Just Like That - I just saw the S3 trailer and dare I say that perhaps the satc reboot has finally found its footing? If the comments are any indication, Iām not alone. of course, this is just the trailer, buuuutā¦itās a trailer that feels like the original. Carrie narrating, New York City as a main character. The ladies saying the types of things they want to say. Of course, I miss Samantha. I always miss Samantha. Whenever I turn on my tv and I need a true pick me up, I turn to the original sex and the city (Iām partial to season 3, and in particular, to where thereās smoke thereās fire, the episode in which the ladies head to Staten Island so Carrie can judge a hot firefighters competition). But I digress! AJLT premieres on may 29th, so weāve got a month and change ātil we can see if it really does feel like the real thing, but so far, so good.
š Retreat by Krysten Ritter - Iām taking a break from romance in preparation for Emily Henryās upcoming release, so Iām diving into Retreat by Krysten Ritter! I find well-told stories about female con artists entertaining, and they usually donāt keep me up into the wee hours of the night. At least they donāt keep me up with terror. They keep me up with edge-of-my-seat excitement!
š How To Giggle - Of course, I am a Giggler! I am a loyal listener of Paige DeSorbo and Hannah Bernerās Giggley Squad. I am obviously Paige-coded (donāt bring up the Craig breakup to me! I donāt care if youāre team Paige, Craig, or Daphne; I think we have to listen to what Danielle Schneider said on WWHL. Itās time for the public to move on from this!
We all have that fantasy version of what cooking could look like. For me, it involves sunlight filtering through big windows, fresh herbs on the windowsill, and an artfully crumpled linen apron. Maybe Iām slicing figs. Maybe somethingās simmering on the stove while a lemon bundt cake cools quietly on the counter. Maybe Bill Withers is playing and Iām sipping a glass of wine while casually creating a deeply nourishing meal with locally sourced ingredients I somehow always have on hand.
Cut to reality.
My early twenties were less Nancy Meyers dream kitchen and more survival-mode reheating. I couldnāt afford takeout most nights, but I always had just enough to join my friends for drinks. I cooked because I had to. The food was usually edible. Sometimes... barely.
But over time, something shifted. I started paying attention, to bloggers I liked, to people in my life who could cook, to the small ways food could feel like care instead of just a chore. I started cooking my way through YouTube videos, following recipes that made sense to me, and finding a rhythm once I had little ones to feed. I donāt cook every night (leftovers and freezer meals are holy), but when I do, I actually enjoy it now.
And somewhere along the way, I started to feel like someone who can cook. Not perfectly. Not impressively. But confidently. Which, honestly, feels like enough.
So, in case youāre in your own ālearning to cookā eraāor just looking for a reminder that dinner doesnāt have to be complicated, I thought Iād share the small, practical things that have helped me become a better home cook. (Number 9 changed everything for me.)
Things That Helped Me Become a Better Home Cook
1. Learn the actual basics
Not the fancy stuff. Just how to dice an onion, roast vegetables, cook pasta correctly, and not burn garlic. YouTube is your best friend here. So is crying over onions until you donāt cry anymore.
2. My grandma was right: if you can read, you can cook
I still say this to myself when I feel overwhelmed in the kitchen. Read the recipe all the way through before you start, and go from there. Itās not rocket science, even if it feels like it some nights.
3. Plan just enough
Meal planning doesn't have to be intense. I check my fridge, skim some cookbooks or saved IG recipes, and build out three days at a time. That way, I always have fresh stuff on hand without overbuying or letting things go bad.
4. Prep before youāre hangry
Nothing derails a recipe like realizing halfway through that you forgot to chop something or preheat the oven. I try to prep everything up frontāeven if that just means putting my ingredients in little piles and wiping down the counter so I feel less chaotic.
5. Keep a bowl for scraps nearby
Sounds simple, but itās a game-changer. Less back and forth to the trash and more flow. Also, keep a towel handy. (Also, compost if you can!)
6. Cook the recipe exactly as written the first time
This oneās from Ina (obviously). Once youāve made it once, tweak away. But the first time, let it be what it is. Thatās how you learn what worksāand what you might want to adjust.
7. Get good at 3ā5 meals you actually want to eat
My aunt once told me, āJust be great at a few things.ā That stuck with me. You donāt need to master 50 recipes. Just find a few staples you love and make them often. For me, itās perfectly cooked salmon, roasted vegetables, soup, and a couple of cozy baked goods.
8. Cooking takes timeāand thatās okay
I used to rush everything. (I still do, sometimes.) But when I slow down and actually let the onions caramelize or give the chicken enough time in the oven, it tastes better. Patience is an underrated seasoning.
9. Use equipment that makes it easier
You donāt need a full set of matching pots and pans. But a sharp chefās knife, one solid pan, and a good blender (if you can swing it) go a long way. For years I only had one knife and one sheet panāand it worked. Now I have a few more staples, and they make a difference.
10. Follow chefs and recipe developers you actually vibe with
If their recipes never flop, thatās a good sign. Iām loyal to Ina, Tieghan, and yes, I still return to the early Goop cookbooks. Find your people and let them lead the way. Cooking doesnāt have to be a solo journey.
I still mess things up. I still order pizza more than Iād like to admit. But I also know how to make a really good soup when the mood calls for it. I can roast a tray of vegetables with my eyes half-closed. And when I have the time and energy, cooking feels like a little love letterāto my family, to my body, to the version of me that wanted this kind of life.
If youāre figuring it out, too, Iād love to hear whatās helped you. Or what youāre working on. Or the one recipe that never lets you down.
Weāre not aiming for perfection in the kitchen, just something nourishing, doable, and ours.
The Second Act is an entirely reader-supported publication. Click here to upgrade to a Paid subscription or gift a friend a subscription here (if a friend sent you this ātell them thanks!). Anything you want covered? Questions? Reply with a comment below! You can also find me on Instagram. Please come say hi!